Number One

Ideal
I feel
wrapped
in bandages

Numb
I feel
like Number
One

Tingling
in finger tips
I feel pins & needles
holding up my smile

Unreal
I feel
wrapped in
everyday sameness

Caress
I feel
her kiss exploding
through thick ice

Aching are my bones
now I feel tendons
snapping
to become a working god

I feel so many things
but no anesthesiologist
can turn me
OFF

DNA

His dimples,
my face

His life line,
my palm print

His mannerisms,
my crossed leg

His need to leave,
my nervous tic

My composure,
his mirror image

His way of speech,
my need to please

His love for my children,
circle fully complete

I wear his boots & jeans

These genes are strong

Circle complete

Dreamwire

I find myself
grappling w/ possibilities
putting the cart
before realities

strangling myself
w/ dreamwire
before the vision
is ripe

we are living
in a YA novel
commissioned
by Stephen King

this shit is stranger
than Lovecraft
but it’s truer¬†than
the rabbit hole

Pancreatic Care Package

Wrapped up
in insulin
wool blank and comatose
this pancreatic care package
still life

I been
dealing with this
over twenty five years
my organs aged and fermented
like wine

No cure
in sight, besides
vision is not so sharp
calluses on fingers, I am
hardened

Wrap me
up in million
butterfly kiss bandaids
tears are not measured in drops of
blood drawn

High, low
I react to
chemical reaction
roller coaster is not exact
science

Confused
incoherent
inconclusive at core
orange juice savior come stop these sweats
and shakes

Oh sweet
oblivion
come sweep me off my feet
my head becomes too heavy to
shoulder

Needle
tip of iceberg
only so much soul seeps
Through with this, hands thrown up to sky severed

But I
would rather live
with this than live without
don’t want to succumb to a lack
of ease

Feelings

Feeling spurned
at every turn
the candle burns
at no end

feeling shunned
brightness of sun
master of none
to no end

feelings feelings
feelings are the problem
sometimes I
don’t want to feel at all

routine routine
this is the problem
mostly I tire
of not feeling at all